There’s a peculiar sense of urgency in my soul.
It rests in my insecurities, gently nestled between my black thoughts and masculine pride.
It hurts deep. Under no other condition, I am ruined.
On the best day I am halted but on the worst I am hunted.
I’m valued as one who values another who doesn’t value anything.
I learn like a teacher who is out of practice and I practice like I’m anticipating a losing season.
But still this tiny sense of urgency reminds me.
Reminds me that I may not have but I can still want.
I may not want as I did as a child but I still deserve fun.
I may be at the end of my time but at least I still have it.
I have to use it.
I need to.
I can’t live this bold black life without anything to show for it but anxiety and debt.
Men. Black men. Sit your pride down and take a walk.
Your birthday is coming up and we’d hate for you to miss it.